If Only
by FlaminFawkes
Summary: he Room of Requirement gave Draco exactly what he required to make it through sixth year unscathed by The Dark Lord. What he didn't expect, however, was that it also gave him what he came to want and need so desperately. Takes place during HBP. DMHG


**Author's Note:** Hey guys! Thanks so much for reading this! This story is my very first attempt at writing a fanfic, and any advice or constructive criticism you have would be greatly appreciated! Thanks to the folks who helped me realize I wasn't being quite clear near the end... hopefully, I've fixed that :)

**This fic is rated M for my attempt at a sex scene between the delicious Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger.  
If this offends you, please do not read this story!**

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I do not own the Harry Potter universe or anyone who resides in it. This is most unpleasant, but alas!

* * *

Draco Malfoy moved quickly and soundlessly through the castle. The moon was brightly shining through the stained glass windows and he made sure to travel within the dark shadows to avoid detection. He chanced a quick look at his pocket watch. 11:30. He was a little later than originally planned, but no matter. He climbed the last few steps leading to the seventh floor, rounded the corner, and headed towards his destination. In this light, he could barely make out the form of Barnabas the Barmy in the tapestry. He paced back and forth three times and the door appeared. He quickly looked down the hallway, and seeing he was alone, he entered the Room of Requirement. 

But he was not alone. An invisible figure had been waiting in that hallway for his arrival, clutching a note from a certain house-elf pertaining to strange activities on the seventh floor. The figure swiftly followed, and Draco didn't notice that the door lingered open a tad longer than it should have as the invisible pursuer slipped in behind him.

The room was massive, and yet it managed to still feel cozy. Oak floors reflected the light of the roaring fireplace, and rust colored walls were adorned with priceless paintings of the Italian countryside in gaudy golden frames. With cheeks flushed from the warmth of the fire, a wild-haired Gryffindor lay curled up on the couch, awaiting his arrival.

"I was beginning to think you weren't coming…" she said as she raised herself into a sitting position. "That perhaps you'd decided to use your devilish charms on another unsuspecting witch," she added in a serious tone, but her smiling eyes showed an entirely different sentiment.

"Well, Pansy was practically begging for a personal tour of my bedroom as everyone was leaving for the Great Hall," he said, rolling his eyes, "but I told her I had some very important matters to attend to."

"Very important matters, hm?" she said, looking somewhat amused. "Well, then I guess I ought to leave you alone to your work…"

"Come here, you!" he yelled playfully, dropping his cloak and running towards her. With almost unnatural speed, she jumped up from the couch and ran over to the oak dining room table, with Draco close on her heels. After circling around the table a few times, Draco feigned right, and she took the chance to head left. He quickly changed direction, gaining on her to the point where he could easily hear the excited breaths issuing from her mouth. As they neared the couches again, Draco got just close enough to wrap his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him. The pair fell back onto the couch, breathing hard.

A huge grin on her face, she quickly relaxed into his arms, laying her cheek on his chest.

"I've missed you, Hermione," he whispered into her ear.

Pulling away, she looked at him quizzically, her nose scrunched up in confusion.

"You saw me in both Potions and Transfiguration today."

"But, it's not the same. We can't…" he paused, looking into her eyes.

"… be us?" she asked, finishing his thought. "I know what you mean. It's just too dangerous for us to be out in the open with this. If Harry or Ron ever found out…"

"Yeah…"

"Hey, look at me," she said, taking his face in her hands. "Whatever comes our way, we'll be able to handle it. I _don't_ regret this… us."

He kissed her softly, looking into her eyes. "Neither do I."

"And just think. We might still have been enemies if you didn't need me to help you with that cabinet…" Looking up at him, she noticed his expression had slightly hardened. "I know you won't admit how much you really needed me to help you, but I saw you struggling at the library at all hours with stacks of books on magically charmed furniture and the like. I bet you would have died searching for the missing piece if I hadn't come along. You _so_ needed me".

_She doesn't realize how true that statement is_, Draco thought.

She smiled at him, and he knew what was coming next. It was the one answer she couldn't wheedle out of him.

"Draco, what is the cabinet for anyhow?"

Draco shifted his weight under her and avoided looking at her in the eye.

"Why don't we start dinner?" he said quietly, staring intently at his shoes.

Hermione noticed his change of subject, and decided not to press him. She knew something was up. It wasn't like him to be secretive with her, but she didn't want to ruin the small amount of time they had together with a fight.

_As long as Dumbledore is at Hogwarts, nothing bad can happen, right?_ she reaffirmed to herself.

* * *

Completely stuffed after a feast of roasted turkey, twice-baked potatoes, zucchini, pumpkin juice, and coconut custard pie, they dragged themselves over to the fireplace and collapsed upon the carpeted area at the base of the couch. 

In this self-induced food coma they would talk for hours, until the sleepiness either wore off or overtook them. Draco looked forward to finding out how her day had been, what new spell she'd discovered… they had no secrets. Well, almost. He had been unable to hide the fact that he had the dark mark in their late night activities, but she had handled it quite well. In fact, she told him that she would always be there for him. She had spent many hours listening to his problems, his fears, his feelings of guilt and remorse. She always tried to convince him that he could turn to Dumbledore for help, that he _did_ have a choice. And while they were in the room together, anything seemed possible, but things looked a lot darker when he was alone.

He looked over at her, sprawled out on the floor with her eyes closed, her chestnut hair wildly framing her face, which now had a look of pure content. The golden light of the fire danced in her hair and bathed her skin in a warm glow. He shifted his position, rolling onto his stomach and resting his chin upon his hands.

"You are so beautiful."

She turned and looked up at him. "You're not so bad yourself, Malfoy," she said, rolling over and crawling closer until their noses were inches apart.

"Yes, I am quite good looking, aren't I?" he said haughtily, a smile dancing on his lips.

She laughed and climbed on top of him, hovering over him as he rolled onto his back to look in her eyes.

"Oh yes…" she said, her voice growing deeper, "You are."

Pressing the length of her body against him, Hermione wrapped her arms around his neck as their lips met in a heated kiss. His arms wrapped around her waist, his tongue caressing hers as his hands stroked the soft skin under her shirt. Her hands moved down over his chest until they reached the hem of his shirt and slid underneath to feel the smooth skin of his toned abs. She tugged at the fabric of his shirt, reluctantly pulling away from his warmth to yank the article over his head. Their bodies were drawn together once more, but their kiss was no longer enough to keep Hermione satisfied.

She needed more. She wanted to feel his skin on hers. She began tearing at her buttons near her neck, willing them to open faster, while Draco, sensing her urgency, began expertly unbuttoning her shirt from the bottom up. When their hands met in the middle, Hermione let out a breath of relief and pushed her bare chest against his. Wrapping her legs around his middle, they both let out a groan as her core rubbed against his hardness. Their lips returned to their now feverish kiss as his hands explored the silky skin of her newly exposed torso, slowly moving up towards her chest. His thumbs finally brushed over her nipples, still contained in her red lacy bra, and he was rewarded with a moan, her breath vibrating in his mouth. As he started devouring the skin at her neck, he unclasped her bra, sliding it off and throwing it to the ground.

Sucking and nibbling down past her collarbone, his mouth slowly made it's way down to her breasts, enveloping the nipple in the wet warmth of his mouth. His tongue circled and teased, his teeth occasionally raking lightly over her now hardened nubs. Her eyes were closed, her head thrown back in pure ecstasy. She grasped the back of his head, pressing his face into her. As he continued to suckle, he moved his hands down her sides to rest on her hips before slowly unzipping her skirt and pushing it past her knees onto the floor. She loosened her grip on his head so that his kisses could travel further down her stomach. As he moved lower, she quivered in anticipation. His fingers lingered at her inner thigh before lightly caressing her wet red lacy panties.

"Oohhh, Merlin!" Hermione gasped.

Draco smiled at the outburst. He loved being able to do this to her, being able to completely unravel the very composed and proper Hermione Granger. He hooked his fingers on her waistband, and pulled her panties off, his face hovering close enough for her to feel his breath on her moist folds. He slowly ran his tongue along the length of her, savoring the sweet-salty taste that was Hermione, but the moan coming from her mouth was enough to bring him back at the task at hand. He began to slowly lap at her swollen nubbin, occasionally swirling around it, other times raking his teeth lightly across it. As his tongue worked at her, he slowly inserted a finger into her, lightly pushing it in and out. She bucked into him, and he increased it to two fingers, then three, making sure she was ready for him.

"Please Draco", she whimpered.

He moved himself up to her lips, giving her a deep kiss as he plunged himself into her, amazed at how wet she was with desire. He began to slowly pump into her, increasing in speed with each thrust, but making sure to hit her special spot each time. Finding his rhythm, she met him with each thrust, bringing him deeper within her. Their breaths grew more ragged as their bodies crashed together again and again. Her pleasure kept building until her body began to shudder, and he could feel her muscles spasm around him, driving him over the edge. As she cried out, "Draco!" he spilled his seed within her. Their bodies relaxed into each other, and he gave her a long soft kiss. He pulled back so that their noses were centimeters apart, enough for Hermione to see that tears were in his eyes as he said, "I love you, Hermione".

He rolled onto his back staring up at the ceiling, and she snuggled up next to him. Feeling completely at ease in his arms, she started tracing shapes upon his chest with her finger, staring at her hand as she spoke. "I never knew why I felt so empty. I thought that burying myself in work would make it go away, and it kind of did… I was so busy I couldn't focus on anything except all the work I had to do. I knew that wasn't the way life was meant to be, but I just didn't see any other way to get through it. I felt so trapped," she stopped and looked him in the eyes. "I didn't think I would ever be happy."

She turned onto her back and leaned upon his chest, her head tilted back and resting upon his shoulders.

"Draco," she continued, in a voice barely above a whisper, " I don't know what would have happened if I hadn't found you".

"I…" his voice caught in his throat. His eyes grew stormy and, feeling her eyes staring at him, he turned away from her. "I feel the same way," he said somewhat flatly.

Feeling the shift in him, Hermione cuddled closer to his form, physically expressing all her love and support. She knew he wasn't ready to share what was troubling him. Soon, he felt her body relax and her breathing became heavy and slow.

Draco looked down at her resting form, his eyes glistening with tears. "If only…" He stopped and stared again at the wall. "If only this were real," he whispered to himself.

Every night he came here, it became easier for him to forget the truth, and it was becoming harder and harder for him leave. This Room of Requirement not only gave him what he needed to keep his family safe from The Dark Lord, it also gave him her. She wasn't only the brain that made his mission possible, but she was the one person he longed to see each day. She was one of the few that could make him laugh and forget his troubles, but when he was feeling down, she gave him support and understanding that Myrtle never could. It was torture returning to the real world, where her warm, loving gaze turned to stone whenever she saw him. The real Hermione would never look at him the way _his_ Hermione did... How could he have fallen so hard for this illusion of life? The Room of Requirement had known exactly what he needed, even when he didn't. Hermione.

_Maybe I could talk to the real Hermione... Maybe I could make this dream a reality? _

He shook his head. It was too late now. Within the next 24 hours, he knew he would be beyond saving. There would be no turning back after that. He silently willed himself to forget the truth a bit longer.

_Let me just have this one moment_, he thought.  
_A last chance to feel what true happiness feels like._

He wrapped his arms around her possessively and closed his eyes, allowing himself to drift off within the comfort of her embrace.

* * *

Somewhere in the shadows, hidden behind Harry's invisibility cloak, another pair of chocolate colored eyes watched. She knew she should be furious... and yet, as she looked at the pair, she couldn't take her eyes off of the sleeping girl's face. 

The pure content reflected in the girl's expression was something she herself had never experienced. This girl's face was so transformed by her happiness that the observer could barely recognize it as her own.

She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to get her emotions in order: This had to be some sort of cruel joke.  
He had been her enemy for years.  
He had made fun of her continuously.  
He was most likely a Death Eater.  
AND  
He hated her, right?  
_She, Hermione Granger, and Draco Malfoy? HA!_

But when she opened her eyes again, instead of being consumed by anger, she could only feel a growing emptiness within. She rested the back of her head against the wall and slowly slid down into a sitting position, wrapping her arms around her knees.

_What if he was it? What if he was... her soulmate?_

But, it was too late for that path now.

Warm tears fell silently down her cheeks as she grieved for the loss of something she never had…  
the love that could have been.


End file.
